the ice-man cometh ...

After 2 days driving down the deserted west coast we arrived at the town of Franz Josef, jumping off point for New Zealands most famous glacier. With Mel still feigning a sore knee in order to liberate the funds from our trip budget for a scenic helicopter trip (I'm in big trouble now), it was left to me to spend the day walking up it.

After spending the first hour of the day getting kitted out with boots, crampons, and full waterproofs our group finally took to the ice. From the bottom the glacier had looked quite small, but with no man-made points of reference to give a true sense of scale we quickly discovered that looks can be deceiving. Two hours of treacherously slippy clambering up and down ice-steps later and we reached the first plateau. Despite having climbed several hundred feet we could see we were merely a fraction of the way up.

We spent the afternoon exploring this area of the glacier on a route that had us ascending and descending vertigo-inducing crevasses using safety ropes, and squeezing between impossibly tight gaps. It was a truly mindblowing day, to spend time on and actually inside the glacier is to really begin to understand it. Although due to a set of leaky boots I must say that a notable downside was my feet spending most of the day in danger of succumbing to frostbite.

Despite Mel assuring me it's not in the slightest bit funny, I had been entertaining vague notions of some sort of spoof post involving the nearby Fox Glacier and a non-existent "Glacier Mint" factory. But as always the truth is more interesting than fiction. As we sat down to fuel up on our packed lunches a Kea stopped by - unique to New Zealand it is the worlds only alpine parrot.

At about a foot tall it is reputed to be the worlds most intelligent bird, with the brain of a 3 year old child (or a 25 year old Australian as our guide helpfully pointed out ... I'm saying nothing). For a moment it seemed to be homing in on my cheese and pickle sandwiches, but recent experiences had left me wary and I made sure of keeping a good distance. Better luck next time my feathered friend ...

All this talk of alpine parrots has left me "pining for the fiords", so our next stop will be Milford Sound. Before that though some even more exciting news ...

I have decided to take part in Movember an annual moustache growing competion in aid of The Prostate Cancer Charity.

If you truly value seeing me make a plonker of myself (and I'm sure you do) then please take the time to visit the donations page and sponsor me for any small amount, my unique code is 160527.

Ever fancied yourself as a moustache designer? Well now is your big chance - as you can see from my photograph taken on Day 4 - I have yet to commit to a design. So consider my face your blank canvas and suggest which style you like to see by adding a comment (and preferably a link to a picture). I'll post a shortlist for you all to vote upon before I take my first shave and I promise to go with whichever gets the most votes.

There will of course be regular moustache updates as the drama unfolds ...